rainbowsoverruins

Talking Bliss with Kym Douglas

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I spent my Saturday talking with Kym Douglas who is my next interview on the Rebuilding Your Life…. Podcast. Kym is part of my weekly work life as a family member on Home and Family for Hallmark Channel, but this was my first opportunity to sit down and talk about her life outside the show.

Kym DouglasKym’s television persona is as the lovely and upbeat expert on beauty secrets of the stars. She’s written four books on the subject, the latest of which is Bliss Happens. Cute story. Jay McGraw, executive producer of The Doctors and his dad, Dr. Phil, suggested the title. Remember all those t-shirts and sayings that deliver the opposite message – s….. happens? Well, bliss happens sends a much more positive message and helps to attract better things into your life. Since publishing the book, Bliss has become Kym’s brand as she shows people how to feel better about themselves by adding a touch of elegance and beauty to their lives. And her message is clear. It doesn’t have to cost you an arm and a leg to do it.

If you read Kym’s bio in her book blurb, you’ll learn that she’s a beauty guru and lifestyle expert who appears on several television programs. She’s been a regular on The Ellen Degeneres Show, on Home and Family and The Doctors. She started her career as a hard news reporter in Detroit before becoming a red carpet reporter. Kym’s passion has always been to cover more positive subjects, so she developed a signature interview style with celebrities, many of whom were willing to share their beauty secrets. One of the early interviews was with soap opera star, Jerry Douglas. In short order, they fell in love and he whisked her off to Hollywood where they have been happily married for over 25 years.

So why did I want to include Kym in a show that is about rebuilding your life and getting past disasters in order to find prosperity? Quite simply, I wanted to lighten the mood. It’s easy to sink into negative mind space when talking about natural disasters, divorces, deaths, lost loves, financial woes and other tragedies. Yet part of the healing process is to move into positive mind space. It’s about gratitude, appreciation and, yes, bliss.

I had to learn how to do that. It was one of the most powerful ways for me to overcome the aftermath of the landslide. The first step was to accept where I was even as I needed something more. I began by asking myself “I am where I am and why is it okay?” The why question – an afformation – gradually changed into “I am where I am and it’s fabulous, even as I dream of something even better.” And bliss happens when we make the most of what we have in order to get what makes us truly happy – and it all comes together. That’s what Kym shows her audience – how to make the most of what we have.

Kym is a person of faith who believes that bliss is a choice. In a poignant share, Kym reveals how she made the choice to believe in the possibility of a positive outcome when no one was giving her very much hope.   If you have a situation in which the outcome is unclear, why dwell on the negative result when you have an equal possibility of the positive result – and the positive feels so much better?

I’d like you to meet Kym Douglas. She’s my next guest on Rebuilding Your Life: Moving from Disaster to Prosperity. The podcast is available iTunes at: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/rebuilding-your-life-moving/id975055547 as well as Stitcher: http://www.stitcher.com/s?fid=62871&refid=stpr.

In the meantime, if you would like to learn more about Kym Douglas and her work now, check out her website: www.kymdouglas.com or follow her @kymdouglas and like her at www.facebook.com/hollywoodbeautyexpert.

Please listen in as we talk bliss with Kym Douglas.

To Your Success,

Susan

Channeling Grief into Creativity with Uma Girish

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Channeling Grief into Creativity with Uma Girish

Bright and early on Friday, I was talking with Uma Girish, one of my next interviews on the Rebuilding Your Life…. Podcast. I became aware of Uma through the 30-Day Podcast Challenge where she introduced her podcast, The Grammar of Grief. Grief is a natural byproduct of loss, whether we are losing a loved one or everything that we have built up in our lives so I was looking for someone to talk about the topic – and there was Uma.

The stages of grief are well documented. In the immediate aftermath of an event, the first responders and community of support (whether friends, family, church and community, hospital or the Red Cross) get us through the shock and strong emotions we experience.

And then we are home alone with more questions than answers, coping with our new reality. There are often so many things to do in our physical world that we are not paying attention to the symptoms of grieving that are popping up around us. I know that for weeks, Peter and I rescued everything we could from our destroyed home as we figured out what lay ahead of us. Although we conscientiously made efforts to get back to our normal routines, it was challenging. When we finally settled into the rental house that would be our home until the financial issues were resolved, we immediately had physical symptoms of distress and spent weeks with the chiropractor, and the anxiety was relentless. Other people may experience a great deal of loneliness, hostility and guilt.

It’s easy to sink into depression under these circumstances. That’s why a friend at church, Sue Smith (who is a therapist), gave me a routine to follow that might stave off the more serious symptoms of depression – and I was watching for any telltale signs.   She suggested that I spend some time everyday doing each of several tasks: Be in beauty or find inspiration through prayer or meditation. Eat good food that has been cooked as if company was coming. Get enough sleep, at least 7-8 hours. Get some exercise. Laugh. Watch TV, listen to tapes and laugh. Talk with a friend with whom you can share anything. Learn something new. Over time, I added a couple of my own. Be of service. Helping others helps you feel better as well. And spend a few minutes every morning to express gratitude and appreciation for life and where you see movement toward restoring your life and building toward something better.

When we are grieving, we may find it difficult to make that shift toward a renewed future. We may have rebuilt as much of the life we had as possible, yet a gaping hole remains and it stops us from enjoying ourselves. We draw a blank on pursuing a different future and don’t want to lose our memories of what was before.   This is where Uma Girish comes into the conversation.

Uma is a Grief Guide and certified Dream Coach, as well as an award-winning author. Her book, Losing Amma, Finding Home: A Memoir About Love, Loss and Life’s Detours is published by Hay House. In it she chronicles her own story of the grief journey she undertook when she lost her mother. That journey became the impetus for her work as a grief guide and the creation of her message: We are not the same person we were before the loss. Although we are changed by the experience of loss, it also opens a portal to a new dream that comes to us through the pain of loss. Our healing journey is to recognize that dream, embrace it and experience the joy of our new creation.

As Uma comes from a place of similar experience, she has the ability to explain some aspects of how we are able to do this through looking at the unfinished business in our lives. And I love her way of describing how gratitude can help us move from being a victim to a victor. She calls it “shapeshifting” our grief story.

This is transformational work. To facilitate progress, Uma offers private sessions via phone and Skype, as well as an eCourse From Grief to Gratitude through her website www.umagirish.com.   She is also the co-founder of the International Grief Council which seeks to educate and empower those who are grieving a loss.

I’d like you to meet Uma Girish. She’s one of my next guests on Rebuilding Your Life: Moving from Disaster to Prosperity. The podcast is available iTunes at: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/rebuilding-your-life-moving/id975055547 as well as Stitcher: http://www.stitcher.com/s?fid=62871&refid=stpr.

Please get ready to listen in as we learn more about channeling grief into creativity with Uma Girish.

To Your Success,

Susan

 

Going Viral with Appreciation

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Did you feel it? My inbox and social media sites have been filled with expressions of gratitude as we celebrate Thanksgiving here in the States.

Since the publication of Rainbows Over Ruins, I often hear from people who have been inspired by my story. After all, if I can survive the after effects of a landslide, and go on to thrive, others can hold onto the possibility that they can too – in all areas of life. They can use the road map I have shared in order to come to understand the power of their minds and retrain their thinking. They can start to grasp the creative process.

Still, when you are in the midst of a crisis, where do you begin? I used to ask myself, how do people pull themselves up by the bootstraps when they have no boots? And the answer was to imagine the boots. It may be a little too simplistic, but imagination is one of the great powers of the mind. Over time, I’ve found that our imagination yields richer results when we open its treasures with an attitude of gratitude and appreciation.

So how do we start? How do we express a sense of appreciation when we are at a low ebb in our emotional life? Here it is. Take the time to appreciate one thing in your life that makes you feel better, brings joy or a hint of well-being every day.

There is an immediate shift in the energy you are putting out. The new energies are closer to what you want to be feeling. The magnetism of that improved frequency draws more of the same. The more you do it, the more you attract.

One of the cornerstones of my meditative work is to express gratitude. I have been following someone’s suggestion that I look for 10 things every day for which I am thankful. Sometimes I have to stretch to think of so many things, but I focus on this feeling as it opens me to new and wonderful ideas during the rest of the day. It does not matter what it may be – a moment of rest and relaxation, sunshine, rain, food, shelter, loved ones, being greeted by a happy pet, solitude, friendship, a new inspired thought, a surprise gift, the opportunity to give to others, goals achieved, the ability to work toward my goals, the connection to consciousness and on and on. The key is to express your appreciation every day.

So what are you happy for today? What are you grateful for? What do you appreciate? If you are looking for an action step to improve your life, grab a pen, pencil or crayon and memorialize it in your journal or drawing pad – even on the back of a napkin. And keep doing it. If you’d like to spread the sense of appreciation to others, send me a comment, make a You-tube video, let the people who serve you know that they are appreciated. Let’s keep the feeling of Thanksgiving going. Let’s go viral with the feeling of appreciation.

May you share your love in the form of appreciation to all around you today.

To Your Success,

Susan

Sprinkling a Bit of Holiday Spirit

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In the mood for a family friendly, feel good holiday movie? May I suggest Hallmark Channel’s NorthPole premiering at 8/7C on Saturday night, November 15th.. I attended the screening for Hallmark Channel’s latest holiday original and had a grand time.

Bailee Madison and Max Charles star. They set out to save the town of NorthPole when a lack of holiday spirit threatens. The film is a feel good example of how a few people working together can make a big difference in the world.

I’m not sure if you are in the throes of preparing for the holidays, but we’re smack dab in the middle of it at Home and Family. All the scary decorations in Dave Lowe’s Halloween masterpiece are down and we are preparing for our big primetime Holiday Special, scheduled for the evening of November 24th.

Before then and throughout December, cast and crew are lining up the music, movement, crafts, food and stories that will bring the magic of the holidays to life. Dave has drawn another beautiful sketch of how the house will look when all the lights are up and other holiday elements come together. What I enjoy the most is the creative thought process involved in pulling this all together. It draws upon the ideas and feelings of so many people as they remember their own holiday experiences.

I’m still thinking about what I want to do at home to evoke memories of the holidays in my hometown: football and fall colors for Thanksgiving, the annual Christmas parade, complete with Santa and Mrs. Claus, and holiday concerts galore. The season culminated as we went to Christmas services, hung stockings by the fireplace, decorated the tree and set out a plate of cookies and milk for Santa, wishing we could stay up to see his arrival. Of course, we never did. Instead, at first light of day, I would creep into my parents’ room to ask them to get up. One of them would go first and then let us know when it was okay to go time to go downstairs as well. I always remember how beautiful the tree was with the colored lights lit. There was something so magical about it all.

Even when I was a mother myself, my father led the annual discussion about Santa Claus. He never allowed me to stop believing — for Dad felt the very spirit of Christmas was embodied in the love and open generosity Santa brought to each family year in and year out.

It did not matter how much was spent. We could make them ourselves or save our pennies for an ideal gift. Even if we were short on funds, we could offer a handwritten note with a promise to make breakfast or provide a service. The important thing was that we thought to give a gift to someone else.

Just as the March girls of Little Women would bring baskets of food to neighbors, we would participate in making up the annual Thanksgiving and Christmas dinners for those less fortunate. Love radiated throughout the community as random acts of kindness were given to others. And Joy! As we sang together, worked together for a common goal, and appreciated our blessings. I feel better just thinking about the ways we can show our mutual appreciation for our loved ones, friends, colleagues and communities. That’s the message of Northpole and one I hope we can embrace this season and sprinkle a bit of the holiday spirit to all.

What if you had a “piano teacher” for your mind?

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Sharing the creative process and being what Noah St. John calls a “loving mirror” to others is similar to developing a pianist or fine athlete.  A piano teacher or athletic coach offers principles and techniques designed to teach you to make music or play a winning game. Similarly, a piano teacher for your mind teaches and offers constructive guidance to help you improve your life or achieve your dreams.

Do you remember those early lessons? Scales repeated every day, reaching for chords that stretched the flexibility of hands, learning to read the notes on the page, and beginning to discover the voice and tempo of a simple composition from clues written on the sheet music… In the beginning, it seemed mundane and arduous; a chore set before you by parents and teachers alike. 

Yet over time, with much daily practice and many weekly classes, we developed a certain agility. Our hands flowed more smoothly over the keys. We made fewer jarring mistakes and we made music. People noticed the improvement and started to appreciate what we were doing.

As long as we kept practicing to maintain these skills and get into the rhythmic feeling of the compositions, the piano yielded its treasures. We mastered them first for ourselves, then gradually shared them with our families, a school band or concert orchestra.  Perhaps we expanded our reach and participated in plays, on a team, or made movies.  We developed resiliency and strength to perform under the pressure of public presentation.

Why do others care about our music or creativity? Why do they come to watch or listen to our performances? Why do they value it? It’s my contention that we express our feelings through our craft and the audience listens because they like the way we make them feel.  And in return, we value the appreciation we feel when they respond to our work.

Our piano teacher is often the first one to guide us to this experience, supporting us through the early developmental stages, providing constructive criticism to help us improve and cheering us on as we achieve new milestones and try our hands at something new.

The analogy here is that the way we think needs to be nurtured in much the same way. We have a mind and we go to school to learn skills that we can use throughout life to help us survive and live a comfortable life. If we grow up in a spiritual home, we learn to pray, attend services or meetings with others and come to value service to our fellow beings.

But without the guidance of a “piano teacher of the mind,” we may not be fully aware of how we may coordinate these two aspects of the mind to create the life we desire. A teacher would help raise our awareness of the qualities of the conscious and non- or subconscious mind. In the materialistic world we do not always recognize the value of the subconscious mind – its open, receptive nature and ability to connect with what quantum physics calls fields of all possibility.  A teacher can help us learn techniques like afformations in order to collaborate with the subconscious mind’s inherent nature and obtain desired results. Anyone who can ask a question can learn to do this.

As a teaching guide to the mind and conscious creativity, my task is to show you the basics and raise your awareness that the subconscious mind does not judge. It accepts what come to it whether good or bad – and reacts in kind.  Your results depend upon both your conscious thoughts and the effect of your feelings as well.  With regular practice you can learn to use tools and techniques to manage both in order to influence the subconscious for your benefit. You can set up a daily inner routine for the mind that is even more powerful than what you do in your outer activities.

Your personal process requires practice, just like learning to play the piano. It also benefits from regular interaction with the teachers who support your growth and others with similar interests. It is inspired by companionship with those who express their joy and speak of discovering new awareness. It benefits from the presence of others who help us see what we may have missed and then help us adjust.

I have long since lost contact with my first piano teachers and my fingers are not so nimble on the keys these days.  Perhaps if I had stayed in touch, my musical skills would be far better. But I know the value of such teachers and apply it in my daily practice routine for my mind.  And I am grateful for interaction with those who keep my skill set up to date now.

If you want all the benefits to be gained through knowledge of the mind in order to get the results you desire, may I suggest you ask for your piano teacher of the mind, learn the basics of the creative process and practice regularly.  With your loving mirror nearby, you can clear the way and enjoy the full expression of your creativity.  Let me know if I can help.

Do You Know Your Value?

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I was thinking about how to identify the audience who would be interested in my offerings when I listened to what Noah St. John had to say about value – the value we bring to others. It made sense to me that before we can identify an audience, we need to know our value so that we can communicate it. However, this has been challenging to me personally. In fact, that’s part of the reason that my book Rainbows Over Ruins took the form that it did. When I began to write, I believed in the value of the success principles, not necessarily in my personal value. Over time, I learned that sharing my experiences, both positive and negative, as an example of someone applying these principles has a value to others.

So why don’t we always see this easily? Noah explains it simply. We cannot see ourselves without the assistance of a mirror. And when we look for a mirror, we want an honest mirror, not one provided by a funhouse that distorts our image. When it comes to the value we provide others, the mirror is not a physical tool, but rather what is reflected back to us from other people. Noah calls them “loving mirrors.” They are the people around us who believe in us even before we are able to believe in ourselves.

There is a special feeling connected with people who support us this way. I was most aware of it when I was studying psychosynthesis and in other group settings. As we shared thoughts, feelings and experiences together, we understood that our role was to listen and support others as they worked through issues in their lives in confidence. Whatever we heard there stayed there. We could share ways we handled similar situations, perspectives we had gained, behaviors we changed and how we changed them. We did not attack or challenge. What we shared was designed to help, not criticize. As often as possible, we found ways to appreciate others for their shares and the value they brought to our lives.

Because a support group is able to show the value we bring to their lives and to others, we gradually come to believe that we can change, cope, improve or acquire new skills. We come to believe that we have value and feel confident about sharing it with others.

Who are the people you would place on your list? They may or may not come from family and friends, co-workers or superiors. In fact, many people do not believe that they have any people who support them in such a positive way. That’s one of the best reasons to find a coach, mentor, support or mastermind group where you can feel the support you need. Once you do, you will find it easier to go after your goals by eliminating any negativity that works against your success.

Part of my daily routine is to express gratitude for the blessings I experience. Included in that list are an ever growing list of people who provide the support I need to keep reaching for growth, expansion and the creation of something new on a regular basis. I have learned that no matter in what circumstances you find yourself, you can find solutions if you are willing to ask for help, be open to receive the assistance that comes your way and then help others in return.

The thought brings to mind a beautiful image shared in spiritual circles of an individual climbing up a rock surface. One arm is extended up to those above him on the mountain. They help him. He, in return, has his other hand reaching back to assist those below who are also climbing. That’s the way I feel about my own journey. Picture me reaching up to those who have taken this journey before me. Now, I’d love to reach back and help you use the creative process to accomplish your goals. Together, we can climb the mountain.

Willing to Meet the Audience

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I’ve spent my morning daydreaming and planning how I am going to share my book Rainbows Over Ruins when it is published. The prospect of reaching out to others has been looming over my head for months. With only a few items in the editorial notes left to address, this could be happening within a very short time frame. Of course, it’s also part of my work in television. We are always asking questions about developing an audience. What I have been learning is that building an audience for a network program and building one for a personal project is surprisingly similar.

First, finding our audience is a natural outgrowth of creativity. At some point in our creative process, we are going to want to share our creations. This is especially true if you make multiple items that require storage, if you want to move a project along in order to make room for new ideas, if you need additional resources in order to continue to create, or want to recoup the costs of what you have already done. It helps to know what you ultimately want from your creativity.

In my case, after a landslide destroyed our home, I became fascinated by the creative process and the power of the mind, especially when I saw that my own steps to rebuild paralleled the process involved. I set out to describe it. What happened to me next led to greater depths of understanding than I expected as each step was revealed and the corresponding life lesson learned. I believe the information contained in the story I tell can improve people’s lives.

Was I thinking about sharing the story when I set out to implement the idea of writing a book? Of course, it was in the back of my mind when I started to write, however, as I got inspired with the project and working through all the details involved in order to see my vision come to life as a published book, how to share wasn’t front and center.

It is now. Once I have a box of books on my dining room table, what am I going to do with it? I’ve been reading and now have scraps of paper, pages in my notebooks and white boards of information designed to help me create a plan to raise awareness of my book so that people will know it exists. All this study has provided me the basics to know what to do. What remains is to activate my willingness to make it so.

It’s a little daunting as I begin to introduce myself to strangers and share what is a very personal journey through the creative process. Yet each time someone comes up to me to ask me a question or tell me how much they are looking forward to reading Rainbows Over Ruins, I feel better. And it feels good to be able to encourage others to share their creative projects as they see me going through the experience as well. Each conversation is helping me realize who needs what I have to offer and I’m glad – and grateful – that they are willing to share that with me.

Making Your Resolutions Count

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With New Year’s around the corner, lists of resolutions for 2014 are being compiled by one and all.

We even made a game for the show all about the most popular resolutions and have guest speakers on the schedule with suggestions about how to keep them.

Isn’t that always the problem? We start out with the best intentions for the New Year and then a few weeks into the year, they have fallen by the wayside. So what are the best things we can do now to get what we want in 2014?

Moving into January, we are like the Roman god Janus looking forward and backward. It’s a good time to check in on the year 2013 to list our top accomplishments for the year and express our gratitude.

We are also formulating our dreams for the coming year. As you make a list, you have a greater chance of sticking with the ideas that really mean something to you. So before you put something on your list, ask yourself where you want to place your focus? Why is it important to you? How do you want to feel when you achieve it?

Enhance your dream projects by visualizing what they will be, how they will unfold, and see yourself in relationship to them. Take an inventory of what you already have and what you will need to acquire in order to accomplish your goals. And round out your thoughts on your ideas by noting the steps that will be required in the form of a plan.

Help yourself stay focused by writing a list of affirmations and afformations to read or recite daily throughout 2014 until you have achieved your goals.

If you take the time to really think through the resolutions on your list, you will have a much better chance of getting them and as New Year’s dawns, you will already be well on your way.

Happy Holidays and much success with your resolutions for 2014!

Susan

Let It Shine, Let It Shine, Let It Shine

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Happy Thanksgiving! It’s the holiday season in my world. In the background, the Home and Family Holiday Special is playing. For the next few weeks, we will think of little other than food, traditions, gifts, music and all the ways to celebrate the spirit of this special time of year.

For myself, gratitude is the first word that comes to mind because I have been so blessed to be working on a show for a network that embodies the highest of values. Back that up with a cast and crew who put in so much energy and good will every day at the “office” which in our case is a beautiful house and gardens.

A lyric crosses my mind. It’s a phrase from a Sunday school song: “let it shine, let it shine, let it shine.” It makes me smile. The lights on the roof and in the trees and the skating rink installed for this show are all shining.

But the song is not about lighting up your house for the holidays; it’s a parable to remind each of us to stop hiding our talents under a bushel. Get the word out. Let others feel your joy as you share your gifts. Each of us has a value and something to contribute to others. If you know what it is, then shout it from the rooftops! If you are shy or unclear about it, then find someone who can help you define and share your natural gifts. The world needs what you have to offer in order to bless and support all that other people need to make their contribution.

The thought inspires me with a great New Year’s Afformation, although you could start using it now. Try saying this every day: Why do I let my creativity shine? Why do I let my natural gifts and talents shine for those who need what I have to offer?

May the holiday season bring you and your families joy and anticipation of a multitude of possibilities for an abundant, creative year.

The Willingness to Re-Focus

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Have you ever found yourself off course? It’s that crazy sensation of being overwhelmed, having too much to do, or being pulled and pushed away from the one thing you want to accomplish toward its polar opposite. Circumstances and events distract us continually.

 In the midst of all the turmoil around us, we have to be willing and able to re-focus. I believe Napoleon Hill called this ability self-discipline and he wrote that the only way to achieve the self- discipline necessary to achieve a goal was to have a strong desire, a purpose, a “one thing” we set out to accomplish.

 I’m interrupted and distracted all the time. When I step out of my office to walk through the production compound, I may be bombarded by questions and requests from every person who comes up to me.  It’s why they rarely see without my notebook. It’s a repository for all their desires.  It’s also a tangible reminder of what I had set out to accomplish when I started and a checklist of what needs to be done in any given day.

Still, even the day’s activities may pull me off course unless I take the time early each morning to focus on my primary goals. With the daily production schedule we keep, it would be easy to choose to sleep in an extra hour or so. However, that hour serves to reconnect me to my purpose. It is the time I take to meditate, to give thanks for what has been working in every area of my life, to ask for the one thing I could do this day that helps me feel the way I want to feel when I am living my purpose. It is the time to align with my subconscious and the quantum fields of possibility. It is my time to center in all that is and all that remains, consciousness.

From this place of restorative silence, I am able to lay aside the emotional angst around me. I can turn off the seemingly unending sources of negativity and clashes of opinions that come from the news, the computer headlines and the papers.  From this place of peace, I can observe the contrasts, observing where each voice comes from and where their vision would take them. I can ask for the resolution of conflict for the good of all concerned, releasing my personal opinions in order to make room for new possibilities and solutions.  From this point of center, I reach an awareness of what action I can take that day to move me toward my goals.  I can then state affirmations and afformations in an interplay of conscious statements with questions for the subconscious.

I am grateful for the awareness that everyone has a desire to create and the ability to do so. Contrasts and conflicts are part of the creative process as we become aware of where we are and where we want to be. As we observe the differences, we can ask for a solution that enables us to feel the way we want to feel when it is resolved. Why is a solution available now? Why do we become aware that we can be guided to a solution?

As long as I am willing to re-focus on my purpose, a daily plan emerges with at least one thing I can do today, within the context of all that I may need to do this day that helps me move toward my goal.  When I follow through on that action, my inner gyroscope senses I am on track and I feel good now, right where I am. 

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